Message from the Butterfly

So I'm getting very close to my due date and am kinda freaking out a little about the labor & delivery. It doesn't help that my hormones have started to go crazy. This morning I asked my spirit guides and my baby's spirit to help me calm down and give me emotional strength to get through labor. Well, as I sat outside having my coffee this morning, I got my help/message.

A butterfly landed on my foot and stayed there or around me for a while. I can't remember the last time I had a butterfly land on me. At least it has been many years.  I knew that I needed to look up the spirit animal totem of the butterfly when I got inside.  Of course, the message was perfect and just what I needed to hear. Here is what one site, shamanicjourney.com, says that really resonates with me. There's such great stuff here that is undoubtedly helpful to many people, so I'm just going to share a portion of their article here...

Butterfly is the symbol of change, the soul, creativity, freedom, joy and colour. It reminds us not to take things too seriously and to get up and move. They teach us that growth and transformation does not have to be a traumatic experience. It can be joyous. Butterflies possess the ability to grow and change, leaving the safety of their cocoon to discover a new world in a new form without fear, trusting their untested wings to fly without a doubt in their minds. They work through many important stages to become the beautiful creature they are. Similar to the butterfly, we too are always moving through different stages, each equally as vital. It is no good rushing to a particular stage, nor is it good getting stuck at a stage and becoming stagnant. Butterfly is a potent symbol for those considering, or in the throes of, a big change. Butterfly is also one of the most inspiring symbols of the animal world, knowing precisely the time to leave the comfort and limitation of its cocoon, flying freely into the world. Quite frequently, we are not so certain. The cocoon of our thoughts and fears may be limiting, they are also safe and familiar. We can become afraid of what may be outside of our limiting thoughts and belief systems, trapping us and holding us back from ourselves, from our dreams and desires, from our unlimited potential.

We can learn how to move on, how to grow from and improve a situation by finding out which stage we are at. This may be the egg stage, the beginning – where an idea is born and not yet reality. The larvae stage is when you physically get your idea going, usually involving preparation such as planning. The cocoon stage entails developing your ideas, project or talent. The ultimate stage of transformation is coming out of the chrysalis, the birth of the butterfly. This last stage is about sharing the colours and ecstasy of your creation with the rest of the world. Remember that we are always evolving, growing and that we are always at one of these stages. Figure out which stage you are at, whether you need more time to complete one stage before being ready going on to the next. Be careful not to rush, nor get stuck either.

Not all change feels deliberate, it can be very subtle. Such as losing a job and then circumstances pushing you in to a new direction. There may have been things going on within you, getting you ready for a change subconsciously, that you didn’t even recognise. If you are feeling insecure and unsure of what is going on in your life right now, then look back over what has been going on in your life recently or even long ago. Have you ever wished that you had a different job? Of changing career? Are you able to see that on some level your wishes are coming true? I’m sure you will remember the good old saying ‘be careful what you wish for..’ What you focus on, is sure to manifest.

Butterfly can help you see that exiting the cocoon suddenly opens a new door, that there is power in trust and vulnerability. No more than you does a butterfly know whether it can fly, but it opens its wings in perfect confidence, and discovers that their delicacy allow its graceful flight, its dance in the air. When we understand that transformation can be as natural as breathing, when we take ourselves lightly, when we trust in our own untried wings to support us, we learn the message of Butterfly, life itself is a joyous dance. Dance brings us the sweetness of life.

Float / Isolation Tank Experiment - Float #3

Week 3
I did float #3 last night at Float Nashville. I chose the 7pm time and the open tank again.

It was a great float! I'm glad I did the night-time again since I always feel zen and ready to fall asleep after almost every float I've done. I slept so well and long when I got home last night!

I decided to try listening to a guided meditation this time. I'm glad I did! I think this is the way to go, especially for those people who have a hard time relaxing in complete silence listening to nothing but your breathing and your thoughts.

Since I'm a few short weeks away from my due date, and I took the Hypnobabies hypnosis for childbirth class, I figured it perfect to listen to one of the hypnosis meditations.

This was the first float in my prego float experiment where I fell asleep (or maybe I was just in hypnosis or deep meditation). It was wonderful. I was able to fully relax within 10 min. and enjoy that wonderful, unique feeling of floating weightlessly that you can only experience in a float tank - or in space I imagine, but I'm not going to fly to space anytime soon. And, as my growing baby only gets bigger and heavier, I appreciate the load off more and more. In fact, it had been a little more than 7 days since my last float and I felt like my body was craving it.

I kind of wish I didn't go into a sleep or deep meditative/hypnotic state so I could consciously enjoy that awesome floating feeling longer, but I know that state is very healing, even if I'm not conscious of it.  While I was conscious and slowly drifting off, for, about the first 30 min., I remember feeling like my body was in a time warp and falling gently through kind of like a black hole into some other dimension or galaxy in space. I remember feeling the presence of other spirits and angels and even communicating with them. They are all getting ready for the big moment when my baby's spirit enters his body fully and permanently and joins us on earth. I also made sure to ask them to ensure it would be an easy, smooth transition for me also. From a spiritual, metaphysical standpoint, I'm aware that his spirit comes in and out of his body as it's growing in my womb and believe that at birth, it will be permanently in his physical body. I feel like during my drifting into meditation, I felt the spirit world views this transition as a major one, like a firework-producing major event. Of course, people who have experienced childbirth probably already understand the magnitude of this event on a spiritual level as well as every other level. I can't wait to experience it!!!

All in all, it was a very relaxing float and I'm still feeling zen the next day. As I've come to know, deep meditative states are healing on many levels and I won't know the effects of it this soon after, and it's often cumulative, but I know it was great for my pregnant body and mind!

Isolation / Float Tank Experiment: Float 1 & 2

As I was deep in my third trimester a couple weeks ago (I'm 36 weeks now), I was really feeling the aches and pains of pregnancy including expanding hips, back ache, leg cramps, hormone roller coaster. It had been a while since I had a float session at Float Nashville, in their isolation tanks and it just occurred to me that there would probably be so many benefits to doing floats during pregnancy. There is something like 600+lbs of epsom salt in the water. There are many benefits of epsom salt for muscles, leg cramps (charley horses as I like to call them), ligaments, etc... The fact that you're taking away all gravity & weight from back, hips, legs, sciatic nerve, for 90 min seems like it would give all that a chance to rest & heal. Not to mention the extreme mental calm you get from the salt and the sensory deprivation. My hormones have been taking me on an emotional roller coaster! When I've done this in the past, I've felt such a peace for days after.


So, I decided to do one float a week for the remainder of my pregnancy and blog about my experiences and any benefits I saw. 

Background on float/isolation tanks if you're not familiar: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isolation_tank 

Here's a site that talks all about the therapeutic benefits of floating on pregnant mothers:http://ovarium.com/lang-en/content/48-bain-flottant-therapeutique-benefices-pour-les-femmes-enceintes-lors-de-la-grossesse

Float #1:

I did a night float (7-8:30pm) in their open tank - which is not an isolation chamber like the wikipedia picture above but more like a big rectangular hot tub (that only has about a foot of water). I really like the open tank and feel the same benefits of sensory deprivation as I did in the other tanks but I feel a little more comfortable in the open room vs. the tank.

As soon as my body hit the water, I swear my back and hips were rejoicing! The weightlessness was heaven!!! I just kept thinking for a good half hour "I'm in heaven". The relaxation that all my muscles felt after just an hour was equivalent to how I feel after a 2-hour massage (because 1-hour massages can only go deep in some areas of your body, there's never time to get that deep, full-body zen in one hour).

During my float, I decided to try flipping over onto my stomach and drape my arms and chest on a long float log they provided. This was wonderful because for the first time in 6 months, I was able to lay on my stomach! And I'm normally a stomach sleeper, so this felt so great! After what seemed like a half hour or so (time disappears in the float tank), I felt I wanted to experience that weightlessness on my back again before time was up, so I laid like that for the remainder of my 90 min. session.

For this session, I decided to use the inflatable neck/head rest they provided and take out my ear plugs. I had always done floats before without the neck/head support and with earplugs in and it always took longer to adjust to being able to hear myself breathe so loudly in my own head. I really liked not using earplugs and using the head rest so I didn't feel I was always an inch away from salt water getting in my eyes. I think I will do it like this from now on.

I also remember falling asleep in all of my last float sessions. I didn't fall asleep in this session. I think my body was just so excited to feel relief and enjoy the sensation of being on my stomach and having no pressure on my back & hips. I did zone in and out mentally though...

I just love and missed the feeling of the water gently supporting my body. Since the water temperature is about the same as my body temperature, and since you're floating in a dark, silent room, after a while, you don't know where your body ends and the water begins. I feel one with the water and it easily takes me on brief out-of-body experiences where I feel like I could be floating in space. It's such a cool feeling!

I felt like I floated home! Every muscle in my body as well as my mind were feeling so relaxed and zen. This feeling extended into the next day too! The extended physical benefits were amazing! I didn't have a single leg cramp all week! I also was able to get a good night's sleep several nights after the float whereas before, I would wake up with hip pain and need to switch sides every couple hours. My back pain disappeared for several days and it only came back with minor pain that I could manage and improve with stretching.

Float #2:

I did the open tank again. This time, I tried a mid-afternoon session (3-4:30pm).

I wouldn't do an afternoon session again because I wasn't able to clear my mind like I have been able to every time I do a night session. I experienced during this session, what I've heard many first-time floaters experience. Not as much physical relaxation because the mind won't stop racing and the anxiety or uncomfortable feelings that accompany this. It's interesting because after reflecting on my first session, it's clear I needed more physical healing at the time then mental healing. And, in my second session, I felt more mental anxiety, or maybe that's a strong word - maybe just that uncomfortable mental state when you feel you should be able to relax but can't and you get frustrated which causes more discomfort. I think, I needed more mental healing this time than physical. Which would make sense because I wasn't feeling as much of the physical discomforts of pregnancy over the last week after my first session but was feeling anxiety over childbirth and the transition into motherhood.

I wouldn't say I felt worlds better with my mental anxiety, which was what I was dealing with this week, after my float but I did feel a little better. The fact that becoming a parent and birthing a baby are such monumental, major life things, does not surprise me that I wasn't able to be completely "healed" after just one float session.

I think part of the mental anxiety healing process is to recognize and face those things that are causing us anxiety before we can release them. I believe my float session allowed me to block out all other life distractions and focus on nothing but the elephant(s) in the room. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. However, I know it's necessary in healing the mind and spirit.

I think a lot of people experience this during their first float, especially those who are in good physical health, because the physical body is usually the first to want to heal before the emotional body. I think giving up after just one session if you experience this is like giving up just as you're starting to make progress. I look forward to seeing more emotional relief after my next session.