Now that I've been a mom for almost 14 months now, I of course feel like an expert. haha. Well, ok, I'll never be an expert, but I feel compelled to share information based on my experience that I wish I had read somewhere before little Bowie came along. For those first few months and beyond.....
Necessary Baby Items
I have read more times than not on those lists of baby necessities on Pinterist that these two things are unnecessary. Well, I will tell you they are definitely necessary.
Bottle Warmer - Even if you "plan" on breastfeeding, there are many factors that may cause you to not be able to, or to not be able to exclusively. (Read the book MommaZen to help prepare you to come to terms with the fact that you can plan for whatever you want when having a baby - and even giving birth - but you are not in control and you're just along for the ride of unexpected surprises along the way). So, like what happened with us, I fully intended on breastfeeding but my milk took way too long to come in AND Bowie had a lip and tongue tie so his latch prevented him from being able to effectively feed. So, as I was pumping away every ~2 hrs, and had breastmilk in the fridge ready to feed him. It had to be warmed, and at 3am waiting around for the 10 min. it takes to warm a bottle on on the stove seems like an eternity when you have a baby screaming in hunger. My husband went out one night that first week baby was home to our nearby 24hr. walmart and bought a bottle warmer because we couldn't take it anymore. It was one of the best purchases we made (and at $25, TOTALLY worth it).
Baby Wipes Warmer - Particularly if you have a fall or winter baby. When you want to change your baby in the middle of the night and don't want them waking up and screaming from a cold wipe freezing their bottom. I mean, would you want a cold wipe on your warm butt anytime? Even now, at 13+ mos., Bowie hates cold wipes and has that familiar body shiver when I tried unplugging it over the summer, because somehow, they get colder than room temperature even in the summer.
Totally Unnecessary Baby Items
Shoes - I mean, come on, shoes for infants are just as ironic as pockets on baby shirts. What do they need shoes for? They never stay on more than 10 min. anyway. And you can get warm socks to keep their feet warm in cooler weather (or better yet, get the footie one-piece outfits so you don't have to worry about socks falling off every half hour). We had a bunch of pairs of shoes gifted to us and Bowie only wore one pair a couple times for special occasions (pictures).
I'm sure there are others I'm not thinking of, so comment and let me know what your unnecessary baby items were.
Necessary Items for the Momma-to-Be
Maternity Clothing Sharing or Rental Sites
LeTote.com
I just discovered this website that I wish I had known about when I was pregnant! Letote.com is like a clothing rental co. where you can select outfits to wear and they ship everything free and you can wear as long as you want and send back and request another couple outfits to wear when you get sick of the others. How perfect for maternity clothes that you're not going to wear again after 9 mos.! Until the next baby that is. ;) They have a monthly membership starting at $40 a month. And I just used a half-off first month coupon that somehow made it only $9! (fyi, they gave me 3 1-month free coupons to share if anyone is interested).
I am a fashion hound and love clothes. I never wear the same thing more than once in 2-3 weeks, so I HATED the fact that I was stuck with the same boring few maternity pants, tops and dresses. And as much as I wished, I could not wear yoga pants to work. I'm a fashionista on a budget, so I wasn't about to go out and spend a lot of money on a bunch of clothes I would only wear for ~6 months. And being a bargain hunter, you know I scoped Goodwill, but maternity clothes make up about 1/2 % of their inventory and I think I only found one item at several near me.
There are other sites similar to this that recently popped up: Borrowforyourbump.com, Stitchfix.com, Bellagravita.com, Labellebump.com, Minefornine.com. Why couldn't these have been around when I was pregnant?!
There are also some great second-hand sites where I bought some nice maternity clothes for a good price, like Thredup.com Swap.com.
Marriage-Saving Tips
1. Don't buy a house and start a new job four months after having a baby. Enough said.
2. Great book: Babyproofing Your Marriage
I had no idea how hard it would be when my husband and I were used to having long conversations on the front porch at night to then be thrust into sleep deprivation, new roles, and no conversation. In the early days, the most conversation we had was a grunt or head nod which meant "hey", as we turned our baby shift over to the other.
I wished I had read this while I was pregnant, but since I'm a communication professor, communication is a big part of our relationship and I knew to talk about roles and partnership expectations before baby came. We had pre-established that we would take 3-4 hr. shifts in those early days, and I told my hubby not to expect a clean house or regular meals. Thankfully I made a bunch of freezer meals before D-Day and had a wonderful network of kind, supportive friends and family to help out. In other countries, the whole community drops everything and comes together to support a mother after the birth of her baby and all she has to do is tend to the baby. What happened to our society/culture?! Geesh. I mean, here, many women's friends and family help out but not nearly to the extent of some other cultures.
